Benefits!

Due to circumstances beyond MY control and the eight year reign of GW, the time has come that I MUST obtain full time employment. We have been rolling the dice lately as we can no longer afford health insurance. So, my ever thoughtful dear cousin (rqm) came to my rescue and referred me to what looks like an excellent employment opportunity.

Via his connections I will be known in the trade as a Medical Concierge. Orientation is tomorrow but I believe that to be a fancy word for receptionist. The company I will be working for have health clinics located in Walgreen's drug stores. Operated by Nurse Practitioners. Not free but reasonable AND they take insurance. So if you can't get into your doctor or it's after office hours, you're on vacation or it's a holiday... see if you have one in your community. Enough with the commercial.

I have known for a couple of weeks that tomorrow is the beginning but denial is not just a river in Egypt. Sure, I passed my drug test without studying and that on line CPR class, but have waited until today to fill out all the necessary paper work and it's taken me the better part of the day to muddle through it all. Making copies as I type.

Now the clock seems to be running faster and faster, laughing at me as well! I buy lottery tickets every week... why not my numbers???

Good news... benefits start right away.
I will have benefits.
Keep saying it over and over...
Benefits Rock!

Bye Harry

The young author appeared on Rosie's show. She'd written a children's book on a pad of paper in a coffee shop. Rosie gave her a Mac.

We were going on a road trip. Rosie had raved. Curious, I went to Sam's and bought the book and had it read in three states.

Fabulous story. Expertly written. Wanting more, I could think of little else as we traveled. Remarkable... just remarkable.

I offered my copy to the daughters of hubby's cousin. No thanks said the holy roller mama when I described the subject matter. But this is good vs evil... just like the Wizard of Oz... Star Wars... not the same she said. Witches and wizards. Your loss.

I have pre-ordered every subsequent volume and read each with the same excitement as the first. Devouring every word... even the ones I couldn't pronounce. I even checked out the audio books from the library so I could hear them read with a British accent.

Book seven, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, came out last July. I was in Salt Lake City and hit Barnes and Noble the day it went on sale. Started it several times but somehow never got into it. Maybe I didn't want the saga to end.

Last week I decided to read it before starting a new job. I finished it this morning and that somehow saddens me. The characters are my friends. I feel a fool for raving on so, but I'll miss their adventures. I was satisfied with the way it ended but would love her to write another series.

Thank you JK Rowling for your creative mind. Your imagination and gift for story telling. You have done wonders for children's literature. Amazing talent... truly amazing.

"SO?"

Cheney on Iraq: "Major Success"

Follow the link... look and listen: Cheney sees progress in Iraq.


On this, the 5th anniversary of the USA's invasion of Iraq, may we remember the families of the thousands killed and wounded many of whom will require treatments and therapy for the rest of their lives. A high price to pay to boost the egos of a powerful few.


Peace

PS: Rosie's video today is awesome. I highly recommend you check it out. Very moving.

I VOTED ALREADY!!!

Once again Florida has apparently screwed up.
Why can't we get elections right? I just don't get it.

"They" are talking about ANOTHER primary.
Count the vote I cast in February for cryin' out loud!

$10,000,000 ... TEN MILLION is the figure they're throwing around, which means it will be more.
Why?
I VOTED ALREADY!

Insurance and property taxes in this state are insane. Health insurance is unaffordable. Jobs are hard to find if you're not in food service or the medical field. Education desperately needs more funding. There is so much more.

Yes, I know, the state isn't supposed to foot the bill but it doesn't matter.

I VOTED ALREADY!!!

One of the Funniest emails I have ever gotten!

You don't really have to be a woman to understand this...you guys probably know what she's talking about, too, if you live with a woman!!


Always

This is an actual letter from an Austin, Texas woman sent to the American company Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. It's PC Magazine's 2007 editors' choice for best webmail-awardwinning letter.

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the Leak Guard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'?
I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior.
You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'

Are you ****ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bull -- And that's a promise I will keep. Always.

Best,

Wendi Aarons Austin, TX